TV star, that's what I aren't

Today, whilst out gathering provisions for Dope Manor, I was approached by a reporter and cameraman from a local TV station (which shall remain nameless) as I approached my car in the parking lot.

This really comes as no surprise, as I'm incredibly telegenic and naturally, they'd spotted me from some distance and were immediately drawn to me as a fine and intelligent specimen from which to get some pearls of wisdom to grace their broadcast.

The reporter pleasantly explained that they were out trying to get reaction shots from people about a proposed factory hog lot operation to be located near Barstow, IL.

Being myself, I certainly felt that I should be able to come up with some sort of opinion on the matter, and I struggled for a few moments to try to come up with one.

I'm almost embarrassed to admit that I came up with nothing. Zip. Nada. I tried to debate the issue out loud with myself to come up with something, but after a minute or so, I had to sheepishly admit to them that I really couldn't give an informed opinion and lord knows I didn't want to add to the glut of uninformed opinion already on TV. I wanted to help them out, but I just couldn't.

I'm certainly opposed to these massive, concentrated hog lot operations. From what I know, they're nasty, in more ways than one. They crowd hogs into almost unconscionable conditions, and produce a dangerous and staggering amount of toxic waste, which leads to possible ground water pollution, and the area for miles around being subject to waves of unimaginable stench.

They literally build good sized lakes to hold this stuff, if you can imagine. The environmental argument against these things is pretty substantial.

And on top of that, it's a way of producing hogs which is really pretty Orwellian and utterly removed from any natural process of raising animals.

But the reporter pointed out that it would also bring jobs, and tax revenue to the area as well.

I was trying to figure out how to articulate these things but couldn't come up with anything on the spot. It didn't help that I was also simultaneously wondering if I had anything stuck in my teeth, if my hair was properly coiffed, and whether to lower my voice, fix the camera with a steely gaze and appear serious, or play it light with some disarming wit.

It was hard for me to speak out against it when I wasn't going to have to suffer the consequences of being it's neighbor. And without knowing more facts about the proposal, I didn't feel I could spout off one way or the other.

What I'd like to know is, given these sketchy details, what do you think about this proposal?