April 1, 2005

O'Brien, Welvaert bury hatchet, vow clean campaign... next time

Saying that they both realize the damage done by negative campaigning, Moline mayoral candidates Pat O'Brien and Don Welvaert today issued a statement saying that they vowed to run a clean, positive, above-board campaign if they ever happen to run against each other again.

As to the current race, they made clear that they intended to continue the mud-slinging, charge and counter-charge offensive and go as low as it takes.

"I'm not an idiot," O'Brien said, "I'm not going to lay down now only to get sucker punched by the Welvaert crowd." Welvaert agreed, saying, "Pat's got me by the short ones as far as finances go, so I'm going to take every cheap shot I can think of between now and the election, and possibly beyond. You think it's been bad so far, just wait until the day before the election."

O'Brien said he'll continue his strategy of responding to the attacks with any sort of counter-charge he can come up with. "I've got a few people brain-storming on how we can find some more dirt. For what they're getting, they better produce."

When pressed for what might be in store in the final days of the race, Welvaert was coy, but did allow that his group has something of interest to the citizens of Moline. "I think people will be quite interested to learn that my opponent once hid National Geographics containing pictures of topless native women under his bed."

O'Brien immediately accused Welvaert of exagerating and distorting the story, saying that they weren't actually "hidden", that in reality he was only storing them there so they'd stay flat. "That was decades ago. Even then I was thrifty with a dollar and realized that they might be worth money someday."

O'Brien advised Welvaert to not get too cocky, as, "I'm not exactly unarmed in this mudfight, sister." Though pressed for more details on any planned revelations, O'Brien played it close to the vest, only allowing that "it has something to do with the tags on mattresses and pillows. I'll just leave it at that."

2 Comments:

At 4/01/2005 11:14 AM, Blogger whispers said...

hahaha

 
At 4/01/2005 1:19 PM, Blogger The Inside Dope said...

Whispers, I understand that Blogger ate some of your comments?

I can assure you that it was none of my doing. I haven't deleted anything today. This is a new and improved screw up for blogger. I apologize for the hassles.

 

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